Vodka my Devotchka

It's been a while since I read clockwork orange but i think I got that right... But I was gonna explain why things have been so cold between Vodka and me. Vodka has pretty much always been my drink of choice, and despite getting me wrecked many times she's always been good to wake up too. No hangovers. Nothing.

But this one fateful time, I drank a whole bottle at a party. The party was at Bump's place, rural style (hence the name Bumpkin - he has cows). Anyhow I did lots of stupid things. I can remember some things well. At one point I was riding on the roof of a car. I started a lot of fights, all in good fun of course, but I'm pretty sure I challenged Wazza to a wrestle and then punched him a few times because I'm a prick. After my bottle of Vodka I started drinking UDL's (I know, I know) I poured one of my cans all over a friend of mine - Deckard. He turned around and grabbed my shirt (ripping it) and then punched me in the head. Fuelled by Vodka and anger over the destruction of my favourite shirt I picked him up and shook him like a rag doll. Then, as he fled, I apparently launched a full, unopened can of coke at him. At one point I ran into the barn where everyone was smoking weed and kicked the bong, spraying filthy bong water all over everyone. I also smoked a whole lot, more than I normally would when drunk. But I guess more drunk means more smoke.

I consider that a pretty successful evening personally but Manny had a good time too. He was laying on a couch with Miss X for half the night pashing and drinking. I swear I saw him stop for a second, lean over the side of the couch to spew and then go back to kissing her. That is pretty fucking gross. She didn't mind.

The problem wasn't the evening itself but what happened the next morning... I woke up feeling dangerously awful. I ran outside to a sink and began to have the most horrible and painful experience of my life. My body spasmed as gouts of fluid forced there way out of my mouth, nose and eyelids. Again. And again. I'd say it happened roughly twenty times in a row with about a second between each spasm. At one point Manny woke up and ran outside because he heard "screaming". The vomit/poison was totally clear except for the large, bright orange particles floating in it. I jokingly referred to these as bits of stomach lining and hoped they weren't. After my mouth, nose and eyes were done being raped we drove back to Sydney, stopping every few minutes for me to fall out of the car and dry retch. Not an experience I'm eager to revisit.

And yet, Vodka was tender with me. It's just so hard to trust her again after what she did to me. Maybe we can try to be friends and see how that goes before we commit to anything deeper.